Assess the situation.
Look at the toilet. Look at your coworker. Exchange the universal “well, shit” expression.
INCIDENT NO. 002SEVERITY: CODE BROWN
SHITTER’S
CLOGGED.
Houston, we have a plumbing problem.
A tribute to terrible timing, questionable decisions,
and the coworker who’s seen enough.
+ 00 FLUSH ATTEMPTS / ZERO GOOD IDEAS
LIVE FROM THE SCENE*CAM_02
THE LOOK SAYS IT ALL.PLEASE REMAIN CALM ✳ DO NOT FLUSH AGAIN ✳ PLUNGER DEPLOYMENT PENDING ✳ PLEASE REMAIN CALM ✳ DO NOT FLUSH AGAIN ✳
CURRENT STATUS Absolutely clogged
ROOT CAUSEUnder investigation
ESTIMATED RECOVERYDon’t hold your breath.
TEAM MORALEDown the drain ↘
STANDARD OPERATING PANICA very serious
A very serious
three-step protocol.
When the going gets tough,
the tough find another bathroom.
Locate the plunger.
It’s never where it should be. Check the closet with the mysterious mop bucket.
Make a tactical exit.
Put up an out-of-order sign. Walk away with purpose. You have a meeting. Probably.
Some problems
can’t be flushed away.
But they can become a website.